I was looking through posts on Facebook when I encountered a motivational post. It said, “Be Happy Always.”
Here’s the thing — I’m not always happy, so am I doing it wrong? Is there something wrong with me because I’m not always happy? Should I always be happy?
Just yesterday a woman tried to publicly shame me for being fat while eating an ice cream cone. I sure wasn’t happy then. I also wasn’t happy hours after it happened. I even posted something on Facebook about how I’d flipped her off with a few choice words. After posting, I worried that it wasn’t happy, wasn’t pure positive energy, wasn’t what an enlightened person should’ve done.
I though about deleting the post or changing the language I’d used. But you know what? That’s me. I’m not always happy. I’m not always nice. I don’t always take the high road when insulted. Sometimes I wallow in the mud with the offending pig.
In the past, I would’ve told myself how wrong I was for “sinking” to the level of the offender. I would’ve chastised myself for not taking the high road in the moment and for admitting it to others.
Now, in this moment, I recognize myself as human. Could I have said something like, God be with you? Sure. But was I wrong to flip her off and cuss her out? Nope. That was me, being human, in a moment of extreme embarassment and hurt. I strive to do and be better in every aspect of my life, but I’m not a god or an angel, I am in this body as a human.
I wish her well now, but my reaction in the moment wasn’t wrong and it certainly wasn’t happy. That is more than okay. I am human.